"What the hell have I gotten myself into?!"
The question that burned itself through my brain and my body as I warmed up (which was a WHOLE WORKOUT IN AND OF ITSELF!!! WHAT THE H-E-DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS?!) and proceeded to battle it out with my first ever Crossfit WOD (workout of the day).
This is no joke, my friends. After we were done with the WOD, which was an AMRAP of 3 power cleans (yeah, I'm learning weights, y'all), 6 toes to bar (which I modified to my weak-ass beginner level), and 9 burpees (nobody likes burpees- if you do, shut your mouth), in 10 minutes (I completed three rounds+3 power cleans), the new thought going through my brain and my body was this:
JENNA YOU SUCK FOR LETTING YOURSELF GET SO OUT OF SHAPE!!!!!!!!!
I don't even know how or why or when I let it happen, but it happened. To be completely 100% honest with you, I hate myself for it. I was in great shape when I was in the Marines, and I had never felt better. Then I got out and hated my life and everything sucked and yada yada yada and I gained a bunch of weight. I got lazy and unmotivated and was depressed. It didn't help that I was in a seriously unhealthy relationship with a man who absolutely refused to build me up, but instead decided to break me down. Yeah, friends, he wasn't THAT great of a guy after all. I'll tackle that subject in another blog post sometime.
Needless to say, I'm in a new place in life, and that means getting healthier. Not just physically, but mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I don't want to look in the mirror everyday and see an unhappy, unhealthy Jenna anymore. I want to be able to wear my size 5 jeans without squeezing into them and then taking them off and living in leggings and yoga pants because my muffin top disgusts me.
Here's to the beginning of a new journey, and the beginning of a beautiful transformation.
jenna<3
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